I'm Still Alive

It has been a while. Things are a bit crazy right now. My orientation for the pre-med program I am attending is next week, and classes start the following Tuesday. It doesn't seem possible. I'm still asking myself if I have completely lost it. That is, assuming that I ever had it to start with.

I only have a few weeks left on my EMT-I training, and its the most intensive. Clinicals, practicals, multiple exams, coupled with the fact that I will have a two week overlap of the two classes. Should be interesting to say the least. More updates soon.

But He's Large!

One of my favorite movies of all time is "Popeye" with Robin Williams and Shelley Duvall. Yes, I'm insane. I suppose I have seen it at least 50 times, but not in a long time. Well, Jamie and the kids gave me the DVD for my birthday yesterday. Too cool. This clip cracks me up!

Too Darn Funny

OK, so I didn't get a chance to update over the weekend. I think I will just start from here!

If you haven't seen this, you gotta take a look.

Cast on Him Your Burdens

I'm still here! I'm going to post several entries hopefully this weekend to get caught up. However, for today, I just had to share something. Today's "Utmost for His Highest":

April 13
What To Do When Your Burden Is Overwhelming

Cast your burden on the Lord . . . —Psalm 55:22

We must recognize the difference between burdens that are right for us to bear and burdens that are wrong. We should never bear the burdens of sin or doubt, but there are some burdens placed on us by God which He does not intend to lift off. God wants us to roll them back on Him— to literally "cast your burden," which He has given you, "on the Lord . . . ." If we set out to serve God and do His work but get out of touch with Him, the sense of responsibility we feel will be overwhelming and defeating. But if we will only roll back on God the burdens He has placed on us, He will take away that immense feeling of responsibility, replacing it with an awareness and understanding of Himself and His presence.

Many servants set out to serve God with great courage and with the right motives. But with no intimate fellowship with Jesus Christ, they are soon defeated. They do not know what to do with their burden, and it produces weariness in their lives. Others will see this and say, "What a sad end to something that had such a great beginning!"

"Cast your burden on the Lord . . . ." You have been bearing it all, but you need to deliberately place one end on God’s shoulder. ". . . the government will be upon His shoulder" ( Isaiah 9:6 ). Commit to God whatever burden He has placed on you. Don’t just cast it aside, but put it over onto Him and place yourself there with it. You will see that your burden is then lightened by the sense of companionship. But you should never try to separate yourself from your burden.

Maybe Next Time

So, I didn't run the ING GA Marathon this weekend. I got off track in my training and decided it was probably a good idea to sit this one out - there's always next year!

I'm re-reading a book that has really inspired me in the last few months. It's title is The Barbarian Way by Erwin McManus. God keeps bringing the following quote to my mind:

Instead of concluding it is best to be wherever God wants us to be, we have decided that wherever it is best for us to be is where God wants us. Actually, God's will for us is less about our comfort than it is about our contribution. God would never choose for us safety at the cost of significance. God created you so that your life would count, not so that you could count the days of your life.

It is so easy to take the safe road. In fact, it can be a temptation of the enemy. If God has chosen for me a difficult path, and I waver and take a safe path, I am being disobedient! God never promised that everything would be easy. I'm learning that one at an all new level.

Unflinching Trust

I finally finished "Ruthless Trust" by Brennan Manning, which I highly recommend. I wanted so share a particularly poignant passage from the book. The Lord has brought this to my mind lately as doubts and fears have grown.

"To live without risk is to risk not living," my paternal grandma used to say. The way of trust is risky business, no doubt about it. To change careers suddenly because one feels unfulfilled, to assume energy-depleting care of elderly parents, to retreat for three days of silence and solitude with Jesus without climbing the walls, to volunteer for a summer in the sub-Sahara with only meager spiritual resources, to take an unpopular position with rumblings of fear in the background, to conquer disillusionment when one finds untrustworthiness where least expected--all these challenges require a willingness to risk a journey into the unknown and a readiness to trust God even in the darkness.

A person should not act impulsively, of course. A careful discernment process involving family, friends, and a spiritual mentor should precede every major decision. But when the appropriate time comes, only the disciple with an unflinching trust in God will dare to risk. And that trust is not naive; it knows that the possibility of making a mistake and getting hurt is very real. But without exposure to potential failure, there is no risk. (emphasis mine)

Wonderful insight. I just pray that the Lord will give me the strength to have that "unflinching trust" in Him.

EMT-I, Here We Go

I passed the comprehensive exam! EMT-I class starts in a couple of weeks. Woohoo!

Big Things Happening

Today I found out that I have been accepted to Agnes Scott's pre-med program! Now all I have to do is figure out how to pay for it and continue to support our family. No big deal, huh. Well, the Lord works miracles, and this will certainly be one! The big plus is that AS allows you to defer for one year if necessary to get your affairs in order. I'm excited about the possibilities!

Tonight I finally took Gwinnett Tech's comprehensive exam, and it was tough. In fact, I would say that it was harder than the NREMT exam. Actually, that makes me feel better about EMS in Georgia, since it seems that their training is held at a high standard. I should find out tomorrow how I did. If I don't pass it, I can't take the class!

A lot of things seem to have come together very quickly this week. Some big decisions are going to have to be made in the next couple of weeks.

Small World

I had a great interview today for a Network Administrator position. It turned out that the hiring manager used to work with Lucent, also my alma mater. The cool thing was, he had chosen my resume before he realized that we were both Lucent guys. I much prefer being considered on the basis of what I know versus who I know. My prayer is that the Lord would open up the door if this is where He wants me. If this comes through, I would likely take pre-med classes at night. That would probably take 2+ years, not to mention the "glide-year" while applying to med school. Of course, all of that is if I don't get accepted to Agnes Scott's pre-med program and/or can't come up with the money to attend. I'm trusting the Lord to show me the right direction. Prayers are appreciated!!

Things have slowed down a bit. Only one exam in sight for the next few weeks. I have to pass the comprehensive exam tomorrow at Gwinnett Tech so I can join in the current class to get my EMT-Intermediate training.

Keep On Knockin'

It was good to be back in church today. I've missed 3 Sundays because of my trip to Cali. Larry Wynn's sermon was about prayer and how we, as Christians, MUST take this activity seriously. I admit, I don't pray enough and I was challenged. Larry used Luke 11 as his scripture, and one particular passage really stood out to me:

And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.

“You fathers—if your children ask for a fish, do you give them a snake instead? Or if they ask for an egg, do you give them a scorpion? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him. (Luke 11:9-13, NLT)

The Lord really knows how to encourage a fella, huh. Have you considered lately what an incredible God we serve?

Time for a Nap

Church History exam number 2 is complete. Hallelujah! I'll sleep good tonight.

Have you ever felt like you were being tested? Sometimes God gives you a direction, with minimal details, and you move forward. Invariably, doubt and discouragement hits from seemingly nowhere. You have to ask yourself, is it God who causes that? No way. In times like that, think of verses such as:

Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you. (Deut. 31:8, NLT)

This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. (Joshua 1:9, NLT)

Then David continued, “Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Don’t be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. (1 Chron. 28:20a, NLT)

More Study!

Tomorrow at about 9:30am, I will be a happy man. The only other exam I THINK I have until April 14th is the comprehensive exam at Gwinnett Tech. Praise the Lord!!

I'm still applying for IT jobs, just so I can keep my options open. I have a couple of awesome prospects! It's not clear yet whether I will be going full-time or part-time to complete my pre-med requirements. The great thing about the program at Agnes Scott is that they will allow me to defer for one year if necessary. That gives me a lot of flexibility. One possibility is that I can work full-time for the next year or so, and get some clinical experience at a part-time EMT gig. That way, I could bank as much cash as possible and get my financial aid figured out.

Please help us pray about our direction for the next year, particularly the big decisions that will have to be made in the next couple months. Thanks SO MUCH to everyone that has already been praying and encouraging us. I love you guys!

Study!

Argghh! Did I mention that I have had a lot of exams lately!? Today, I spent several hours preparing for my Church History exam on Saturday morning. Have I mentioned that I am taking that class? It's once a month on a Saturday (all day). I'm only 7 credits away from my masters degree, so there is no way I'm going to give up now. It may take me a few more years to get it done, but I feel like the Lord wants me to finish it.

The funny thing is that as I have gotten a bit older, and hopefully wiser, I have realized that I love reading history. If you want to read an EXCELLENT book about the American Revolution, try David McCullough's "1776". I tore through that book in just a few days.

By the way, I passed my NREMT certification test! I'm now a certified EMT-B. Next step: get licensed with the state of GA.

Back to the books...

Exams, Exams, and More Exams

Today I took the NREMT certification exam. It's an computer based adaptive test, so it was a bit more dificult than I expected. Supposedly, the test adapts to your skill level and asks you harder questions based on your ability. I should find out tomorrow how I did.

I also found out I have to take a 'comprehensive exam' to get in the EMT program at Gwinnett Tech. I've taken more exams in the last 6 weeks than I have in the last couple years! Better get used to it, huh.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Man, that class took more out of me than I thought! I was flat wore-out today. I did accomplish some important stuff, though.

While I was in California, I found out that you must be an EMT-I to ride an ambulance in Georgia. So, my first order of business when I got home was to start the process of applying to Gwinnett Tech so I can get the intermediate training that I need to get the next level of certification. The final, late application deadline is the 16th. It'll be cutting it close!

The Intermediate class will only go to June, and I will get to do about 30 hours of clinical time. EMT-I's have to be trained to do intubations, IVs, administer certain medications, and other advanced life-saving procedures. We actually get to 'practice' at the hospital and clinics on patients. I know, it sounds scary, but I'm sure it's with the consent of the patient.

Type No Evil, Click No Evil, Browse No Evil, & Jeff

So, I've been accused of being a computer nerd, but I've never done this. Check out what I spied at LAX during my layover on my way home. Four folks all in a row, identical computers. Anyway, I thought it was funny.

It was a GREAT trip home! The nice Delta clerk at LAX upgraded me to first-class; I wish I could always fly that way. Do you remember the Seinfeld episode "The Airport" where Jerry had a first-class seat and Elaine got stuck in coach? Reality ain't that far from their depiction, but I had an empty seat next to me. That was cool, I just chilled and watched "Rocky Balboa" on my personal LCD screen. It was a really good movie, by the way.

By the way, my EMT class ended quite well. I learned a LOT! Not only that, but it was a great group of folks, and as always I enjoyed getting to know everyone. I'll go and take the NREMT Exam this week. Now, I'm going to catch up on my sleep!

Almost There

Today was a much easier day. We got done at around 3pm, and I was able to pack for home! The only thing I have left is the final exam tomorrow morning. I feel better already.

Now I have to find at least a part-time gig so I can use my new skills. I have to get my EMT-I before I can work on an ambulance crew in GA, which will take a couple of months at community school. No biggie. In the meantime, I am hoping to get a job at an ER or something like that.

All that's left is passing the NREMT test. I'm going to give it my best shot next week!

Practicals

I passed the practicals today! If you have a "critical fail" on any of the six assessments, you have a chance to do them over. I got them all on the first try! WOOHOO!

Tomorrow morning is Exam #5, and then Saturday morning is the big, bad final. Supposedly, it will be very similar to what we will experience on the NREMT certification test. At a whopping 150 questions, it will be a lot of fun - if you're into that sort of thing.

The VERY cool thing is that in almost exactly 48 hours from the time I am writing this entry, I will be landing back in Atlanta. Home sweet home. It'll be great to see Jamie and the kids. Rebekah had a meltdown tonight when I talked to her and told me "I just can't take it anymore! I want you to come home now!" It's great to be loved.

One last thought: Someone said a very cool thing to me today after my first practical, which was the trauma assessment. Trauma is one of the two most involved assessments we do, for obvious reasons. I was the second in my group to volunteer to complete a scenario. What happens is, you walk outside and the proctor sets up a trauma scenario with another student. That student acts it out, and it's my job to ascertain what the injuries are and treat them accordingly while keeping in mind the criticality of rapid transport. My patient had a compound fracture of the left leg and pain in his abdomen after a MVA. My assessment went smoothly, and I felt really good about it. After it was over, the proctor asked what I thought was wrong with the patient (she asked me afterwards because an EMT's job is not really diagnosis). I said that it was probably an abdominal bleed, and I was right! One of my classmates, who is a very nice lady a bit older than I said, "Bill, you should be a doctor." It doesn't sound like much, but that really encouraged me.

On that note, the sandman is calling.

Finished Day 11

My ride along was mostly uneventful today. We transported 3 patients classified in California as 5150, which basically means that they were on an involuntary phychiatric hold. In any case, it was interesting to see how things work on a BLS bus. I did get to take vitals on 2 of the patients, which was an experience. There will likely be many more opportunities for me to do so.

Tomorrow we have our practicals. That is basically running through scenarios and demonstrating that we can follow the correct medical procedure. I'll be glad when it is done, since it's a little stressful.

I'm getting homesick. There's something magic about 10 days. I always tried to keep my mission trips under 10 days, because if you went more than that strange things happened. I just completed day 11, so I am hoping for the best for day 12, 13, and 14.

Ride-along

Tomorrow morning is my chance to do a ride along in an ambulance with a crew from AMR. I'm very excited about it. My shift starts at 6am, so needless to say I will be in bed at an early hour tonight.

Class is still going quite well, and my grades are staying up there! The instructor told us that we could certainly pass the NREMT certification test if we do well in the class. That encourages me, since one of the first things I'm going to do next week is take that exam. My life is full of exams lately, what's up with that!!

I'm going to bed.

Psalm 139

For some reason, I felt very discouraged today. I was reading my nightly portion of at least 100 pages in my EMT textbook, and decided that I needed to talk to the Lord for a minute. He reminded me that I had not done enough of that lately.

I told Him, "Lord, I'm discouraged. What am I doing here. Am I doing what you want me to do? Have I missed the boat somewhere?" There was more, but that's the gist of it. I went to open up my Bible, and a piece of paper that I had put in the back cover fell out on the table. It was Psalm 139:

Psalm 139 (NLT)

For the choir director: A psalm of David.

1 O Lord, you have examined my heart
and know everything about me.
2 You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
3 You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do.
4 You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, Lord.
5 You go before me and follow me.
You place your hand of blessing on my head.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too great for me to understand!

7 I can never escape from your Spirit!
I can never get away from your presence!
8 If I go up to heaven, you are there;
if I go down to the grave, you are there.
9 If I ride the wings of the morning,
if I dwell by the farthest oceans,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
and your strength will support me.
11 I could ask the darkness to hide me
and the light around me to become night—
12 but even in darkness I cannot hide from you.
To you the night shines as bright as day.
Darkness and light are the same to you.

13 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
16 You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed.

17 How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
They cannot be numbered!
18 I can’t even count them;
they outnumber the grains of sand!
And when I wake up,
you are still with me!

19 O God, if only you would destroy the wicked!
Get out of my life, you murderers!
20 They blaspheme you;
your enemies misuse your name.
21 O Lord, shouldn’t I hate those who hate you?
Shouldn’t I despise those who oppose you?
22 Yes, I hate them with total hatred,
for your enemies are my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

Enough said.

Ouch

Today I successfully treated a trauma patient who had fallen off of a bull and was kicked and stepped on. He had a compound fracture of his left femur, and flail chest also on his left torso. I did on-site stabilization, got him on a spine board, and did a rapid transport to the closest hospital while I did a more focused examination and monitored his vitals.

OK, so it was a mock scenario, but it was cool. Hopefully, I'll be able to really help someone in that kind of situation soon. Of course, around here it's more likely to be a redneck who was run over by his 4x4, but who knows.

I seem to be spending a lot of time in classrooms lately. Probably should get used to that, huh.

Extrication

Good grief! There is so much to learn, but today marks the end of EMT boot-camp week 1! What a whirlwind. I'm getting about 5 hours of sleep a night and attending about 6-7 hours of class and 4 hours of skills labs each day. Regardless, this stuff is fascinating. It's amazing to see the complexity that God has woven into our human bodies and how they react when damaged. It reminds me of what an awesome God I serve.

The labs are very cool. Today, I learned how to utilize a Kendrick Extrication Device (KED) for extracting a stable patient with possible spine injuries from situations like vehicle collisions. I've included a couple of pictures of my team, "the red team", practicing the use of the KED.

Altered Mental Status

Today was a difficult day for me. We learned about patients who present with what is called an "altered mental status". This is a valuable assessment tool for EMTs and can apply to a wide range of medical issues ranging from trauma to medical events or conditions. Of course, this is one of the indications for strokes.

You probably know, my Dad passed away from a massive stroke last August, so it was very strange to learn the signs, symptoms, physiology, and treatment for someone who has had a stroke. I remember the doctor asking him a bunch of questions over and over, which I now know they were using to determine his level of consciousness. If I am recalling it correctly, once they asked Dad: "How old are you Mr. Sims". "47", he answered (he was 57). "Do you know where you are?" He couldn't really answer that one. "What year is it?" He said something like 1968. "Who is the President, Mr. Sims?" To which he boisterously replied, "GEORGE BUSH!" As weird as it sounds, that will be a good memory of Dad, because I saw HIM in his answer. You just had to be there and know him to get that. Maybe you do get it.

I still miss Dad as much as I did the first few days after he died. I suppose I always will.

You're My Boy Blue!

Our class's official motto has become, "You're my boy Blue!"

Don't ask me why. It's probably sleep deprivation.

Exam One is Done

We had our first exam in EMT Boot-Camp today. Everyone looked tired, with blood shot eyes and big cups of coffee. I was right there with them.

I think I did well on the test. It's going to be a long week and a half! It'll be worth it, though.

Everyone please pray for Jamie and the kids while I am sequestered away learning!

CPR

Today was the first day of my experience in EMT boot-camp. We spent the day getting certified in CPR for healthcare professionals. It also included some very basic life-saving skills. We'll get deeper into that in the next 2 weeks I'm sure. I highly recommend that EVERYONE get CPR training, especially if you have kids. The American Heart Association certification is what you will want. Just click here to find a course near you.

I've got a LOT of reading to do tonight (about 170 pages)!!!

Off To School

One of the things that I am doing to prepare for application to medical school is Emergency Medical Technician (EMT) certification. I'm signed up for a "boot camp" in Cali, which runs 12 hours a day for 14 days. That is, not including hours of study each night. I also get some ride along time in an ambulance! Supposedly, I can get my NREMT certification for EMT-Basic afterward. I know one thing: I'm committed and will learn absolutely everything that I can. My goal is to be able to work in an ER or on with an ambulance service in Gwinnett county while getting some pre-med coursework under my belt. It should be interesting.

I'll post more updates when (and if) I get the time!

Duh!

Why do I do these kind of things to myself?

I mentioned a few entries ago that I was going to do the "Run the Reagan" half-marathon. Well, I did and it was an awesome race again this year. Unfortunately there is more to the story.

My buddy David and I had just finished the porta potty drill, and were headed to the start line when we hear the announcer say “about 2 minutes left”. Then I heard him say something about race numbers. Have you ever had one of those moments? Realization hit me, and I looked down to see NO race number on my running jacket. I LEFT IT IN THE VAN a quarter mile away. I told David to go on without me and took off. I ran all the way back to the van, put on the number, ran back to the start. You know a real friend when you brain fart at a race and they stand and wait on you for 4 whole minutes so they can run with you. You're a good man Dave. We started 4 minutes late, but it was cool. Not just in a L.L. Cool J kind of way, if you know what I mean! Actually, the temp was quite nice after about a mile.

Stuff like that'll keep you humble.

NO MO GRE!

It's done! I completed the GRE today. Didn't do too bad, I think. (1240; 640 Quantitative, 600 Verbal) I suppose that is good. All I know is that it is above what I needed for the pre-med program that I am applying for. Like Forest Gump said, "One less thang."

In Class

Thank the Lord for wireless access! It makes the day go quicker (I think) when you have an all day Church History class on a beautiful Saturday. I studied diligently for our exam this morning, and it went quite well. One goof up -- I figured out I had the wrong textbook! Luckily, history is basically history. I ordered the correct text, and no harm done.

Instructor's back, I better pay attention!

Still Busy, Can You Believe It?

You'd think that I'd be a lot less busy now that I'm not working a full-time job. Yeah, right! That's not a bad thing, though. I would certainly go more crazy if I didn't have things to occupy my time.

I'm taking "Church History" at LRU this semester. The good thing about that is I LOVE history. So far, the reading is absolutely fascinating. I have the textbook in my "Currently Reading" box to the right if you are interested. The only bad thing about the class is exams. Argh! If you want to read a really intersting story, look up Charles Martel ("The Hammer") and the Battle of Tours. Good stuff.

One of my other current challenges is knocking off the cobwebs in my brain when it comes to standardized tests. In particular, the GRE. Surprisingly, I remember a lot of math, and my vocabulary is quite good. However, I still have a lot of work to do! Many hours of study so far, and many more to come. Click on this link to see how much you remember; you may be surprised.

Even bigger than these challenges, is trying to figure out the finances of providing for our family and attending a pre-med program, possibly full-time. Please pray for us in this. I know the Lord is going to take care of everything, it would just be nice to know how! That makes me think of a scripture I read last night:

It was by faith that Abraham obeyed when God called him to leave home and go to another land that God would give him as his inheritance. He went without knowing where he was going. And even when he reached the land God promised him, he lived there by faith. (Hebrews 11:8-9a, NLT)

Lord, give me the faith of Abraham!

That's all for now. Many blessings, everyone.

On To The Next Chapter...

So, it's completely official now. My family and I are embarking on a new chapter in our lives. I've been diligently researching medical school, and what it takes to get there. It's a long story, but we've got lots of time. In case you haven't seen it, here is the letter that I wrote for Sugarloaf. It says it all:

January 30, 2007

Sugarloaf Community Church
1401 Old Peachtree Road
Suwanee, GA 30024

Dear Sugarloaf family,
You may have already heard that I am no longer on staff with Sugarloaf Community Church, but I wanted you to hear that officially from me. Don’t worry; everything is fine! Our family is happy and healthy as ever, and God is so good to us. The reason for our departure is as simple as this: the Lord is just taking our family in a radically different direction from what we ever would have imagined. Doesn’t He have a way of doing that sometimes?

It had become increasingly evident in the last year that the direction that God was taking our family was changing. Boy, is that an understatement! I won’t go into all the details, but the bottom line is that I feel God leading me into a career in medicine. This is something I have had a strong desire to do since high school, but God has His own perfect timing. With His help I hope to use that kind of expertise, whatever form it takes, in the mission field. As you know, I have traveled around the world while at Sugarloaf, and have seen the needs of the world first hand. I sense that Lord has work for our family to do there, and we just want to be obedient to His call. Not too long after I accepted Christ (at age 30) my consistent prayer was, “Lord, use me wherever, however, and whenever you want.” Now is really where the proverbial rubber meets the road.

There is NO way that I could ever say in a letter how much Jamie and I adore the people of Sugarloaf Community Church. You are part of our family. We have laughed, cried, served, and grown together over the last 5 years, and we will never forget that. Make no mistake, we love you!

We have so many friends at SCC, so we hope to continue those relationships which have come to mean so much to us. Please don’t hesitate to come by, or give us a call, or an e-mail! Also, you can keep track of what’s up by periodically checking my Blog at http://www.billsims3.com. I promise I will try to keep it up to date.

Again, I love all of you, and I wish you all the very best in the Lord.

Many blessings,
Pastor Bill

Enjoy the winter wonderland tomorrow morning, and be careful out there!

He Cares

SO much to talk about, but now that it is about midnight, I think I will forego any long discourses until later.

I've been thinking a lot lately of how God takes an interest in the smallest details of our lives. One of the passages in the Bible, which has given me great comfort is:

What is the price of two sparrows-one copper coin? But not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows. (Matt 10:29-31, NLT)

JESUS said this. Think about it. Of all the millions of creatures; sparrows, horses, dogs, cats, duck-billed platypuses; God knows when even one of them dies -- and He cares! We are the apple of His eye; the pinnacle of His creation. How much more does He care for us?! If He has the hairs on our heads numbered, does He not care when we are down? Does He not care when we have upheavel in our lives? Does He not care when we feel far from Him because of our own misguided actions? The answer to that question is in Matt 10. He cares more than we can know.

Races

Signed up for the "Run the Reagan" half-marathon today. I'm very excited about that. Last year I ran it, and it was COLD, but I did get a personal record (2:07)! The temperature didn't matter; I enjoy running in the cold, that is after about a mile when I warm up. I'm going to use it as a training run for the ING Georgia Marathon in March. That should be interesting...

Come join me on one of these! I promise it'll be lots of fun.

Times, They Are A Changin'

OK, so Blogger support finally responded and fixed the problem I was having. At least they did respond! The funny thing was that I received a request to do a short survey on my support experience. I got a good chuckle from that one. The even funnier thing was the question regarding the response time. Too bad it was multiple choice instead of free-form text. Then again, this IS free!

A lot of changes are going on in my family right now. I am no longer on staff at the church where I served for a bit over 4 years. However, the Lord is giving us a vision for the future that is exciting and doggone scary at the same time. I'll talk more about this in future posts. In the meantime, please pray for us!

For now, I think I will try to make some money in my area of expertise -- computer systems design, administration, support, etc. It'll be good to get back to that for a while. I actually did miss it, surprisingly enough. That shouldn't really surprise me, since my Dad originally got me interested in computers very young when he purchased a Texas Instruments 99/4A. It didn't have a monitor, you just used a converter box to connect it to your TV. I started programming BASIC (on the TI 99/4A, it came on a cartridge kind of like an Atari cartridge) at age 12. Just thinking about it brings back a ton of memories.

It's late, I think I'll go to bed.

10 PRINT "ZZZZZZZZZZ"
20 GOTO 10

Tech Support Ain't All It Used To Be

In the old days, technical support was all about HELPING the end user. I think Blogger must have forgotten that. I still haven't got a response from their technical people, if there actually are any (the only way you can contact them is through an online form). So, I e-mailed a bunch of folks to let them know of my new address, http://www.billsims3.com.

If it has been a while since you checked the site, then welcome back! I hope you will come back and enjoy some of my random craziness. I redesigned things a couple of weeks ago, and I hope you like the new setup.

Here are a couple of quotes I came across that you can ponder. Enjoy, and come back soon!

By three methods we may learn wisdom:
first, by reflection, which is noblest;
second, by imitation, which is easiest;
and third, by experience, which is the bitterest.
--Confucius

If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
--Dolly Parton

Amen, Dolly.

Crazy Pills!

I'm so annoyed. Computers are supposed to make life easier!

My blog is messed up right now, and I have had to contact support to get it fixed. Who knows how long it will take, but I decided I would go ahead and post some stuff.

The good thing is, I will have my own domain name once all of this is fixed -- http://www.billsims3.com. A lot more flexibility once it's done.

This is completely random, but lately I have felt like Mugatu in the movie "Zoolander". I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS!

Happy New Year!

It's been a while, huh.

Well, 2006 is over. I don't know how it went for you, but mine was quite an interesting year. 2007 promises to be even more eventful, if I have my guess. Is that good or bad? We shall see.

Today I started the book "Ruthless Trust" by Brennan Manning. I have a lot of big decisions to make in the next few weeks, and this book has already given me a sense of peace about what is coming. I am learning more about what it truly means to TRUST the Lord with all of our lives. It's funny, but one of my prayers in the last few weeks has been for clarity. Maybe I was praying the wrong prayer. In chapter 1 of Ruthless Trust, Brennan relays the following story:

When the brilliant ethicist John Kavanaugh went to work for three months at "the house of the dying" in Calcutta, he was seeking a clear answer as to how best to spend the rest of his life. On the first morning there, he met Mother Teresa. She asked, "And what can I do for you?" Kavanaugh asked her to pray for him.

"What do you want me to pray for?" she asked. He voiced the request that he had borne thousands of miles from the United States: "Pray that I have clarity."

She said firmly, "No, I will not do that." When he asked her why, she said, "Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of." When Kavanaugh commented that she always seemed to have the clarity he longed for, she laughed and said, "I have never had clarity; What I have always had is trust. So I will pray that you trust God."

My biggest prayer for 2007 is NOT for clarity, as it seemed to be in 2006, it is for TRUST.

The Irony of Serving the Lord

Yesterday, I was blessed to be able to attend church at a local Russian congregation. Once inside the little chapel, connected to a larger church building, I felt like I was back in Russia. It was a good feeling. It made me want to hop on a plane and head to Moscow.

Isn't it funny how God changes your opinion so drastically sometimes? If you had asked me in college about Russia, I would have responded something like "Remember the Cold War? Those guys are out to get us!" Years after college, I met my now dear friend Leo Semenov. He and his wife Nadia started a missions organization which reaches out to children, particularly orphans, all across the vast expanse their home country (TEAR). We have traveled together to a couple of different cities including Shuya and Smolensk to work in orphanages, and my life has been radically changed because of Leo's influence. Don't you think that is ironic? One of the guys that was "out to get me", ends up being a mentor, a friend, and a co-worker for Christ.

It's so cool working for the Lord.

A Man's Greatness

"A great man shows his greatness by the way he treats little men."

I read this recently, and was particularly challenged by it. Do I look down on folks who seem to be less privileged than I? Do I belittle others who haven't had the opportunities that I have enjoyed and been blessed with throughout my life? Do I unwittingly ignore those who seem unimportant by the world's standards? God forbid.

"Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me." (Ps. 51:10, KJV)

"Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life." (Ps. 139:23-24, NLT)

That's my prayer. Clean out the junk that would allow me to treat anyone as unimportant. Jesus loves EVERYONE He created. We are ALL important in His eyes. He expects us to love the same folks that He does. That's a bunch of folks. Pretty much everyone, no matter how 'little'.

It's Not All About Success

Today, I happened upon a quote from Mother Teresa: "Obedience, not success."

Who would have known that so much could be expressed in only three words. It reminds me of how the Bible itself can jam so much meaning into the most seemingly simple passages. What a wise, Godly woman she truly was. She understood, probably more than most humans ever will, the concept of success in God's eyes. It's not about how many awards you get, it's not about how well-known or liked you are, it's not about how many great things that you have done. It's just about simple obedience.

Dictionary.com defines obedient this way:

Dutifully complying with the commands, orders, or instructions of one in authority.

It made me think, "Am I complying to the Lord's commands in my life or am I doing my own thing?" I won't pain you with my answer to myself. It isn't a bad thing to be reminded that there is One who is much greater than I who has all authority. The bad thing would be if I didn't act on that truth. So, my prayer today is "Lord, help me to pursue obedience NOT success."

Pure and Genuine Religion

James 1:27, "Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you." (NLT)

I have heard folks talk about their "life verse". You know, the one verse in the Bible that encapsulates who they are and what God has created them to be. It felt a bit odd to me when someone talked about this, since I didn't really have one. Don't get me wrong, I don't think everyone HAS to have a life verse. In fact, I'm sure that many don't. Most folks would probably point to a number of verses that express their life better than their own words. At this point in my life, I don't think I could articulate my life purpose better than James 1:27.

Back From Russia

I'm finally back from Smolensk, Russia and recovered from the wonderful jet-lag. It was a great trip to a new region in Russia. It never occured to me several years ago that I would come to love the Russian people as much as I now do. I'll post some pictures as soon as I have the chance.

There's just something about a mission trip that pulls you closer to the Lord. I needed that time with Him in the last couple weeks. It was good to be back into the place of service that I love so much.

See, I have a good excuse for no postings in the last couple weeks. There's not much opportunity for internet access in Smolensk. I've found that it isn't necessarily a bad thing, but I must admit it is good to be back.

Dad

It's been an interesting week. I'm just trying to get back totally into the swing of things. Some may not know, but I lost my Dad unexpectedly at the age of 56 on August 30th. My Mom had the hard task of planning Dad's funeral on their 38th anniversary -- that was a difficult day. It just seemed surreal to be picking out a casket and making arrangements for Dad. It still feels that way, four weeks later.

We had spent over 4 days in the hospital with Dad in intensive care from a massive stroke in the left hemisphere of his brain. Every time we spoke to the doctors, hoping for some good news, it just didn't come. I could tell that they desperately wanted to give us some hope; I certainly wished they could. On Wednesday morning, the 30th, the neurologist prepared us for the next 24 hours by informing us that in his opinion that would be the longest that Dad could last. He used the words, "his death is imminent". It still didn't really sink in.

I went about the morning, trying to make sure everything and everyone was taken care of; praying for Dad, and certainly for Mom. In a moment of reality, I asked the Lord to allow me to be there in the room with him when he passed. Determined doesn't even describe the emotion I felt in regards to being there with him as he left this world.

That afternoon, at around 5:30pm, my Mom's pastor came out into the waiting room and told me that I needed to go back "right now". I knew it was happening. God answered my prayer, and I was able to be at my Dad's side, holding his hand, rubbing his arm, telling him how much I loved him and that everything was going to be OK and I would take care of Mom. I hope he was able to hear me. Either way, I took comfort in remembering the first 24 hours after his stroke, when he could still understand me and I had the blessing of being able to say one last time, "Dad, I love you."

And just like that, at 5:50pm, he was gone. It still doesn't seem real. It seems more like one of those dreams that you wake up from, which are so vivid and so realistic, that you can't immediately decide whether it really happened. I know it did, but how do you grasp something like that?

The Lord almost immediately impressed upon my heart some words that I believe He wanted me to speak at Dad's funeral. I know that it must have been from Him, because of the way it came to me. I would like to share the words, as best as I can remember them, which I hope and pray honors my Dad for the great man that he was.

"First of all, I would like to thank everyone so much for all of the prayers, encouragement, and support. We have been so blessed by so many family and friends. I would like to specially thank Riverside Baptist Church, Sugarloaf Community Church, and Cypresscare, and there are so many others. Dad would have been very pleased by the love you have all shown for our family.

As I thought about Dad in the last couple of days, many words and thoughts have come to mind. Many of you knew Dad, but I'm sure that some did not know him personally. So I am going to share these words and thoughts with you. For those who did know Dad, just remember. For those who did not know him, I hope this gives you a good glimpse of what a wonderful man he really was.

Dad was:

• Brilliant
• Confident
• Fiercely Protective
• Mom, he was romantic
• Reliable
• He had the highest integrity, and taught me to always act with the highest integrity
• He was ornery, sometimes
• He'd get mad, but be over it in minutes
• Trustworthy
• Private
• Hilarious, he had a great sense of humor. He really was a funny guy. I don't know if it is good or bad, but I think I inherited a bit of that from him.
• Opinionated. You never had to guess where he stood on anything.
• Loving, in his own way
• Loyal
• Particular, about his things and about his family
• Very unique, there will never be another like him
• Simple
• Un-assuming
• Not pretentious. He didn't think too much of himself and didn't think too much of those who did. He never put on airs - he was who he was.
• But the most important word to me to describe him was -- DADDY.

Thank you all, and God bless you."

I miss him already. My daughter, Hannah, was sitting in my lap a couple of weeks ago and was obviously upset about Granddaddy. She said, "Daddy, I don't think I will ever get over Granddaddy dying." I replied, "Honey, you won't ever get over it. My Granddaddy died when I was about your age, and I still get upset about it sometimes. That's OK. You will always miss him, and you won't get over it. But, I promise as time goes on, it will get a little easier and a little easier."

It's hard to see that right now, but I know what Dad would have said (I've heard him say it so many times): "Death is a part of life, and life goes on."

Thanks Dad. For everything.

Things Change

So, it's been a while. Well, a lot can happen in about a month. Life can change radically, but one thing that helps (when the changes aren't always that great) is that I know the Lord has a plan. In tough times, it's cool to see the intricacy of God's involvement my life. I just don't know how folks live through some things without that hope.

I'm going to try and get back to my schedule, 3 or 4 times a week. Keep me honest! I have a lot to let you folks know about.

Clarity

Sometimes in life, it seems that the Lord brings you to a point of clarity. In the last couple of weeks, the last 12 hours in particularly, He has made obvious some things that I was unsure of. Now, I'm not talking about little things, I'm talking about big, life changing things. It's scary, but the one thing that keeps me from losing my mind (what's left of it) is that I know that He has spoken.

I will share more later. Right now, just help me pray that I will know what the Lord is saying and act immediately on His directions.

Running Fool

Today was our church's yearly Sugarloaf 5k. The weather was GREAT! Last year, the temp and humidity were almost unbearable and my official time was 26:12. This year, I beat my time by a whopping 2 seconds: 26:10, not bad for a 37 year old.

The really cool thing is that Jamie (my wife) and I ran as a husband/wife team and placed 3rd with a combined time of 56:49. We didn't get at trophy, what's up with that!?

My next race is the Lightning 10k in Sandy Springs. Should be fun!

Ceiling Tiles and Beans

I don't know exactly what my malfunction was today. I walked out of my office twice and left my keys inside. Luckily, our facility manager was around for my first brain lapse. The second time, I wasn't so lucky.

So, there I stood. No key to my office within 10 miles or more, other than the one within a few inches, separated from me by a barrier of drywall. I looked things over and decided if I could find a ladder I could go over the wall, and through the drop ceiling. One of our youth (lately we call him Beans) made the mistake of saying, "You won't do that."

Is that a fact?

I found an 8-foot ladder in the furnace room; just tall enough to reach the bottom of the drop ceiling. Once I finally got the ceiling tile out of the way, avoiding the large metal pipe and fiberglass insulation, I determined that I had enough space to squeeze into the ceiling and stand on the top of the wall. All the while, my audience is growing. By this time, there are four folks standing below me in the hallway with eyes wide wondering if I was that insane. I figured they would know me by now, for Heaven's sake. Beans was still taunting me: "You won't do that." Dude, don't you see me with my head in covered in ceiling tile rubble and fiberglass insulation?

Finally, I was able to sit on the top of the wall with my legs on the hall side. Over my shoulder I could see my keys. That kind of ticked me off, so I had the fleeting thought of someone holding my legs while I dangled down to get them, but it didn't take me long to rethink that one. I'm not completely insane, after all.

I stood up on the wall's edge, grabbed a fortuitously placed 2x4 above my head with both hands, dangled over one of my padded visitor's chairs, thought "Lord don't let me die", and let go. With a loud thud, I came to safe rest on the chair's seat.

As I opened my door from the inside, the crowd that had gathered stood and stared for a second. Their eyes seemed to be saying, "I can't believe you just did that." Then Beans said, "Man, I wish I had a video camera so I could have recorded that". Thank goodness he didn't. Then I certainly would have mangled at least one important body part. You know, Murphy's law. (By the way, Murphy needs a beat-down.)

Just another day at the office.

Milestone

I could tell that I was approaching a crossroads in my life and ministry. The Lord just gives me a sense of these things for whatever reason. Sometimes the changes are good, sometimes not. This time, as it turns out, the changes are incredible! God is opening up some unbelieveable opportunities for me. More on this later, so stay tuned!

I ask myself so often, why in the world does the God of the universe care to take personal interest in my life. It certainly isn't because I deserve it.

His Strength

I just can't understand what would possess someone to want to kill themselves and 300 more people with them on an airplane. It's a good thing that I don't understand. What deep hatred must be in their souls. The strange thing is that they would think themselves quite religious individuals. I'm not into religion, I'm into a relationship with Jesus. Thank the Lord for His protection, and great job to the hard working folks that caught these psychos.

Today I attended the Willow Leadership Summit. I've only heard Bill Hybels speak a couple of times, but his talk this morning really hit home. He spoke on the life cycle of a leader. Towards the end, he told a story of what he called a 'defining moment' in his life. He was in Zambia helping to hand out large bags of food grade 'mealy meal'. A young woman whose husband had died of AIDS, and who had two children of her own, had taken in an additional two children who had been orphaned by AIDS. She was a small woman, and couldn't pick up the bag of food so she started to drag the bag down the road. He decided to help her carry it to her house (which turned out to be 2 miles away). As he walked along the path talking to the woman, he said that the importance of succeeding as a leader in the church hit him hard. He felt the Lord saying to him, "Bill, if your leadership fails, people die." Man, what a responsibility we have. The rest of the day, that same statement has echoed in my mind, "Bill, if your leadership fails, people die."

Lord, give us as leaders of your church the strength to succeed.

Not Too Smart

Here's a good lesson for you: Never run a 7 miler outside during a heatwave.

Somehow, I missed the fact that we have had temperatures in the mid 90's lately. I'm just so darn tired of running on the treadmill!

When I finished my 90+ degree 7 miler, my only thought was, "You idiot."

Friends

Just a thought: How boring and tedious would life be without friends?

I have been blessed with some truly great friends. I consider them a direct blessing of God. I don't know specifically why, but I was thinking about that a lot today.

I'm even thankful for Bo.

No Technology Required

I know this; you realize how much you are dependent on technology when it isn't available! Our church's server and internet connection has been down for a day or so, and it really has put a monkey wrench in the the works. E-mail, internet, sharing files; what do we do without it? How did we function before it?

Oh well, I suppose it doesn't hurt to get out pen and paper and pick up the phone. It's a good thing we don't have an IP phone.

I had a thought: Do I depend on the Lord even as much as something like technology? If He were "not available" for a time, I think it would become quite obvious how much I need Him. In fact, I believe He does pull away a bit sometimes (at the same time, He never leaves us) just to remind us how much our lives truly depend on His love, grace, and guidance. It may be painful for a time, but it is a true act of love on His part.

I just thought of something else. It's a good thing I don't need e-mail, or even a phone, to contact Jesus. He's always there, and He will always listen. No technology required.

Old is Relative

It's been an interesting month! I've led a mission trip to Costa Rica, vacation, pastor's retreat, and in the middle of all of that work and family. It hasn't lent itself to spending much time blogging. The weird thing is that I really do enjoy this.

My kids are amazed by the funniest things. As I was writing this entry, Hannah noticed me typing and said, "How are you doing that!". Now, keep in mind that I am not a particularly great typist, but it looks impressive (as long as no one notices me hitting the backspace key hundreds of times). I told her that I took lessons when I was in high school from a wonderful, and eternally patient, teacher Mrs. Terry. Get this: on an old IBM Selectric typewriter! Believe me, I don't feel old!! Is 37 really old? When I was 16 it seemed ancient. Now, I delude myself into thinking that it is still 'spring chicken' age. My friend George likes to say that "Denial is not just a river in Egypt." To which I respond, "What were we talking about?"

Well, knocking on the door of the big 4-0 is a strange place to be. I have learned by experience now that it creeps up on you. It makes me wonder if the next 40 years will go by as fast. It just reminds me that I MUST use every moment wisely.

Just Babbling

I ran the Peachtree Road Race for the third time yesterday. Just me and 55,000 of my closest friends. Man, it was HOT! That is definately not the race to get a personal best. I can tell you one thing; I slept well last night!

Today was my first day back to work after vacation. Do you ever have one of those days? Not that it was such a bad day, just crazy and somewhat overwhelming. I have lot's of those lately.

I have heard it said, "Attempt something so huge for God that it is doomed for failure unless He be in it." Now, I don't know if what I am attempting is that huge, but it certainly feels like it! God seems to be teaching me what it means to lean on Him at an all new level. It's interesting, but I look back at my life in Christ since I accepted Him in 1999 and I can see the relational ebb and flow. Not that He has ever abandoned me in any way, but there have been times when I was so close, and other times when I was so far away. The really cool thing is, I know He will never leave me. I have a friend that sticks closer than a brother. It helps me to remember that when I see that the relationship has reached one of those ebbs that seem so inevitable.

I'm babbling. The bottom line is, I'm so thankful that Christ's acceptance of me is not based on anything I do (or don't do). I am accepted. Period.

I'm also thankful that I didn't have heatstroke in Piedmont Park yesterday.

Don't We Always Need Another Week?

I just got back from vacation on the Redneck Riviera (Panama City Beach, for those who only know the more common name). We had a great, restful week. The kids really seemed to enjoy themselves, and Jamie and I ate mighty well. Our favorite place is called "Angelos" and has the best steak I have ever had.

If you know me, you are probably surprised since I normally don't eat beef at all. Well, I break that personal rule only a couple of times a year, once on vacation at Angelos and the other when I visit Moscow. Angelos because the food is AWESOME, but Moscow is a different story.

When we go to Moscow on mission trips, generally we visit the McDonalds on the way out and on the way back into the city. Unfortunately, the only thing that seems like a safe bet is a cheeseburger (they call it the "Royal Cheeseburger", aka "Big Mac"). I just can't bring myself to eat the unrecognizable cubes of processed mystery meat that is listed as "chicken" or "fish". I know better than that! Of course, come to think of it, what makes me think that the cheesburger is actually beef? I suppose it's like they say, what you don't know won't hurt you.

I think I just need another vacation.

Various Ramblings

Tonight, I spent some time at Hamilton Mill Community Church, which is now our North Campus. Something struck me. Here we were, two separate churches, now becoming one body in Christ. The spirit of unity was so obvious, that I could tell that only the Lord could accomplish something this cool. What an exciting time for our church, but also for me as a pastor!

So, Father's Day is almost over. I had a pretty good day. It was busy, to be sure, but I was reminded how blessed I am.

VBS was last week, hence the hiatus in blog entries. It was worth every moment I spent! I was able to teach 260+ kids about missions for 5 days straight, and get to know many of them. My plan is to make this part of my schedule each year. Who would have ever thought that I would enjoy teaching kids that much?!

One quote that has stuck with me recently was by Albert Einstein. Loosely quoting Al, "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." The Lord is stretching me in this area, since I tend to be a "if it ain't broke don't fix it" kind of guy. I'm having to instead become more of a "it may not be broke, but break it and then fix it and it will be better" guy. That should be quite interesting.

Unfaltering Reliance

I'm in the process of reading a great book by one of my favorite authors, Leonard Sweet titled "Summoned to Lead". Half way through, it's an awesome read, but that's not what I want to talk about.

In the book there is a quote from 19th century cleric William Ellery Channing* which says:

The greatest man is he who chooses right with invincible resolution, who resists the sorest temptation from within and without, who bears the heaviest burdens cheerfully; who is calmest in storms, and most fearless under menaces and frowns; whose reliance on truth, on virtue, on God, is most unfaltering. (emphasis mine)

Wow. That's the guy I want to be. Lately, I have been praying that the Lord would show me what it means to truly lean on and trust Him. I think I have done an OK job of this in the past, but I feel in my spirit that He is calling me to an all new level of trust and reliance. It's exciting, because I have many challenges ahead in the coming months. You would think I would be worried and completely stressed, but oddly enough, I am at peace. Maybe I am on my way. This kind of calm in the midst of a life storm can only be supernatural.


*Mr. Channing was a Unitarian Universalist, whose theology I disagree with. In any case, I believe that you can learn something from just about anyone. This quote was also attributed to Stoic philosopher Anneaus Seneca.

Prayer Walk

I just wanted to share my notes from the prayer walk that we hosted last week for our Vacation Bible School coming up next week.

"Tonight we gather to walk our property and pray the Lord’s blessing on our VBS program. I was reading the story of Hannah from 1st Samuel, and something struck me. Hannah prayed for a child for many years. She was barren, and had to endure taunting and the despair of a woman who could not bear children. So what did she do? She took it to the Lord. She told God that if He would only give her a child she would dedicate him to the Lord’s work for his entire life. The Lord heard her, and answered her prayer. Samuel arrived not that long after Hannah’s desperate prayer. Hannah was true to her word and dedicated Samuel to the Lord. In 1 Sam v.27&28, it says:

“I asked the LORD to give me this child, and he has given me my request. Now I am giving him to the LORD, and he will belong to the LORD his whole life." And they worshiped the LORD there.”

I think this is what the Lord is asking of us today. He has blessed us with children, not just as mother’s and fathers, but also as a church. We are to dedicate them to the Lord and PRAY for them as they grow. It’s not a cliché, they are the church of tomorrow, and the world is not getting to be an easier place to live. Their challenges we cannot even comprehend right now. The prayers we send up for them now, in 2006, will be the foundation of their ministries and their dedication to the Lord in the future.

We want a very successful VBS this year. We are praying for over 300 kids to take part. But the bottom line is not in the numbers, or in the success from a human perspective. The bottom line is: Did these precious children grow closer to our Lord? Did kids who had no knowledge or understanding of salvation receive Christ as their Lord? This needs to be our prayer tonight. As we pray for many things, this is the measure of success. A success that will bring glory to Jesus Christ, and not to us. That, He will be pleased with. And when it is all over, we can do the same as Hannah and Eli did when the miracle child Samuel was dedicated: We can worship the Lord in His sanctuary."

It's Been a Long Time Since I Rock and Rolled

Hiatus. Gap. Space. Lull. Pause. Break. Call it what you will. Man, has it been that long?! I really do like doing this blog thing. I have learned, oddly enough, that I like to write. So why not make more time to do it? Good question, time to fix that one.

Anyway, craziness of all craziness. My life is rolling along, sometimes it seems a blur. Does anyone else experience that?

Lately, I have come to the realization that I need an all new level of reliance on Christ. I have so many responsibilities and I don't want to screw things up. Well, if I have anything to do with it I will. If Jesus has anything to do with it, things will be greater than I could even imagine. Not only that, but HE will get the glory.

If I come up with any great insights on what it truly means to rely on the Lord, I'll let you know. In the meantime, I'm just going to pray and trust.

Washing Dishes, Again

What is it about washing dishes that causes me to ponder life? If you have been reading my blog long, you will remember another story when I caught myself singing a song and it took me to a place I wouldn't have expected. Well, it happened again. This time, it was so much more special.

As I was soaping up the pot in which the potatoes were cooked, I found myself again singing. This time it was the classic Joe Cocker song "You Are So Beautiful". If you have ever heard this song, it's what I would call a tear jerker.

I happened to look up and into our living room, and there was my daughter Rebekah. She was sweetly humming an unknown tune, and lovingly putting up toys that she hadn't pulled out. Man, it hit me. What a beautiful child. How blessed am I. God, I don't deserve to be so blessed. I felt an overwhelming need to hug and tell her how much her daddy loves her. So I did. I hugged her tight. I kissed her cheek and said, "Rebekah, Daddy loves you so, so much." Her response I'll never forget: "I'm so glad you're my Daddy." I squeezed tighter. I told her again that I loved her. I didn't want to let go.

Now, not many things bring tears to my eyes, but after that I boo-hooed. I wept almost uncontrollably on and off for about 20 minutes. It touched me so deeply. I wish I had the talent to describe what that felt like, but I have decided that it is absolutely beyond any words.

That wasn't all. Later, I hugged all of my beautiful children tightly as they went off to bed. Then, I went up to the girls' room to tell them goodnight. I kissed Rebekah and told her again that I loved her, and then she put the icing on the cake. She whispered, "You're the best Dad ever. I love you Daddy." How could it possibly get any better than that.

I don't really feel like I am the best Dad ever, but I want to be the best Dad I possibly can be. My children have been entrusted to me by my heavenly Father, and I don't take that lightly. Sure, I've had times when I messed up bigtime. Then again, I've also done some really good things. My prayer is, "Lord, make me the kind of Dad that you have been to me. Help me to have the same unconditional love for my kids that you have for me, one of your kids."

I get a picture of Jesus looking down and saying, "Bill, you are beautiful to me. You are my creation, and I love you. I love you in spite of your failures, your faults, your often wavering faith. I love you, and you are beautiful to me." How could I ever deserve that? I don't, and yet He loves me anyway. I hope and pray that my children ALWAYS know that I will love them no matter what, and they don't have to do anything to deserve it.

Miracles Still Happen

So, I took 2 weeks off from running due to my bum knee. I can tell you, that was tough! During the entire time, it seemed like a cloud was hanging over me. The uncertainty of when I would be able to get back on the road was, at times, almost unbearable. I just don't feel as good when I'm not running.

This week, I started again. Monday was not very encouraging. After getting used to runs of up to 20 miles at a time, 3 miles shouldn't be that big of a deal. You'd think. It was less than half a mile into my first run in many days that my knee started barking at me. Barking like a rabid rottweiler. Bummer, 2 weeks off didn't work. What a rotten way to get back into one of my favorite activities. In any case, I finished the 3 miler, somewhat dejected.

Wednesday morning rolls around, and I'm on my way to work. I was listening to one of my heroes, Mark Rutland, on tape. He was talking about how the Lord healed him of some debilitating back problems early in his ministry. Some old ladies found out about his struggle, and they prayed over him intensely. He was healed. The doctors tried to write it off as a mistake, but he was having none of that. It was an awesome sermon, and I didn't really think that much about it for the rest of the day.

That is, until I finally was able to work in my Wednesday run. Normally, I like to run in the morning, but as things worked out, I didn't get the chance until late evening. I figured, surely I can get in 4 miles. Don't want to overdo it.

I hopped on the treadmill, punched in a 10 minute/mile pace, and I was on my way. Amazingly, no pain after half a mile. No pain after 2 miles. Holy moly, no pain after 3 miles! Then it hit me; I think the Lord has healed my knee! Simultaneously, I recalled Dr. Rutland's sermon from earlier that day. Surely not. Surely it's just a fluke. Immediately, my faith was starting to waver. Could I believe, in faith, that the Lord had healed me, even though I was approaching the 4 mile mark with not so much as a twinge of pain? I have to admit, I still had my doubts once the run was complete. But, the Lord was still dealing with me.

I don't run on Thursday, but I noticed that the ever present dull ache in my left knee was no longer there. Weird. My faith was starting to grow.

Friday, my long run day. Still a bit hesitant, I went to the gym, as is my normal routine. Again, on the treadmill I passed 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 miles. No problem. You know what the coolest part of that run was? The Lord clearly said to me (not in an audible voice, but I knew it was from God) that I would have no more trouble with my knee. Incredible.

Another really cool thing that came of all this is that my faith has been grown and strengthened. Why in the world would God do that for me? It seems so small, and you may think I'm insane (wouldn't be far from the truth), but I know what the Lord did for me. If that doesn't help keep me humble, I don't know what would. Thank you Jesus.

Quick

My task list grows, and my blog entries get shorter. I suppose that everything in life has a balance. Maybe folks like shorter entries? In our fast paced, task packed lives, who has time to read? Who has time to rest? Who has time to relax and enjoy time with our friends and family?

One last question: Which is more important, getting our task list completed or living fulfilled and contented lives surrounded by those we love - and those we love knowing that we love them by our actions?

Yeah, life is in a balance, but if I were unbalanced I think I would rather tip on the side of relationships.

Good Day, I Said Good Day!

Today was a great day. Forget the sinus crud that I have because of pollen, or the fact that I have not been able to run for 2 weeks while I rehab my left knee, or that I had a long work week. It was just cool to be able to get up early and spend some time at the ballpark with my daughters. Jamie was at her sister's graduation from UGA, so I was on softball duty.

It was a simple day, but I have come to the conclusion that the simple days are the best. The girls played the best games that I have ever seen. Hannah threw a girl out at first from third base. She also moved to circle early in the game and threw out several others at second and first base. Great defense today. Then, on her last at bat, she smacked the ball down the third base line - the hardest hit I've seen from her - and got an in the park homerun. She also was awarded the gameball.

Between games, we went to my Mom and Dad's house and visited for mother's day. I really did enjoy sitting outside and just talking with them. That doesn't happen as much as it should, I decided.

Then Rebekah played an awesome game. It was against the number one team in her league, so she couldn't have picked a better game. She played circle, so she threw out a bunch of girls at first. She caught a pop-up. She ran down a girl going into home and tagged her just before she stepped on the plate, saving a run in a very close game. Then, in the bottom of the last inning in a tie game, she came to the plate with the bases loaded and hit a hard grounder just left of second base to drive in the winning run.

What an awesome day. At times like this I'm reminded how blessed I am. It's easy to get soaked up in the craziness of life and forget, for a time, that I am so blessed. God knows that sometimes I just need a nice reminder.

I Can't Believe I Ran the Whole Thing

Last weekend, I ran my first marathon; the Country Music Marathon in Nashville. I wish I could explain the feeling of finally crossing the finish line after many months, and seemingly innumerable hours, of training. It didn't matter to me that my knee completely went out on me at the 11 mile mark. It didn't matter that I finished a whole hour longer than I had planned. At that point, it just mattered that I finished.

My knee trouble didn't appear before that day, so it was quite a mystery when it started tightening up on me around mile 6. By the split where the marathon runners went one way, and the half-marathoners went the other, I could hardly walk. The more I stretched, the worse it got. The conflict inside my mind and heart grew with every painful step. I finally told my buddy, David Hornsby, "You better go on, I don't know that I will be able to finish." Reluctantly, he finally went ahead with best wishes, after he generously spared a couple of his Advils.

Think about it. You plug away, working toward a seemingly unattainable goal. You build yourself up with expectation to the big day when your preparation will finally be tested, only to be sitting less than half way to the finish line deciding how you are going to explain your failure.

That's exactly where I sat. Right there at mile 11, watching the other runners happily jog by toward their long anticipated goal. I told the Lord, "If you have something to teach me in this, I will accept that, but I REALLY do want to finish this race."

Then something clicked. I got up and started hobbling forward, pain with every step, wondering how in the world I was going to make it another 15.2 miles. I sped up slowly. My knee loosened up. I told myself, "If you can make it to 18 miles, you've got this thing." I was flat determined to finish, no matter what it took. At that point, I would have crawled to the finish line if necessary.

Next thing I knew, I crossed the finish line. I hadn't reached it in the exact way I expected, nor in the time I had predicted. Nevertheless, I finished. A little sore, a little beaten, a lot hungry, even more thirsty, and absolutely ecstatic.

Funny thing is, the Lord did use this experience to teach me a lesson. Thankfully, it was a much different lesson than I thought I was going to learn.

There have been times in recent months that I have completely felt like giving up on some things. Just like mile 11, I have gotten precariously close to turning around, finding the medical tent, and hitching a ride off the course. So, who said life would be without pain, or stress, or life's unpredictable difficulties? Only those who live in some alternate reality. Sometimes you just have to push through. You don't know how long the pain is going to last. You have no clue what the journey will look like. You just know that you have to keep going, and trust that it is all for your best. You have to finish strong.

"Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may obtain it." (1 Cor. 9:24, NKJV)

I, for one, want to win the prize. There's no way I'll win the prize for the marathon (bum knee and all), but there is an eternal prize to obtain. Should I put in any less training, or have any less determination in the spiritual realm than on the race course? The lesson I learned that day is that giving up is just not an option. I simply can't give up on the Man who has never given up on me.

Pray

Today we came together as a church and as a nation to pray. Prayer has been the habit of our forefathers, prayer has birthed many revivals, prayer is the only thing that is going to keep our nation close to our Lord Jesus.

I look at the state of affairs in our great country, and I am saddened. There is a great turning away from the morals, standards, and faith of those who came before. We have forgotten the God of all things who desires to have a close relationship with each of us. We have forsaken the discipline of getting on our knees and crying out “Lord, here I am, I repent of my wrongdoing, please use me.” Instead our cry has become, “Lord, what can you do for me next” if we call on him at all.

Now is the time to fall on our faces and repent for our nation. Repent for the materialism, selfishness, self-centeredness, and moral bankruptcy that the world mocks us for. Now is the time to acknowledge that we can’t do this ourselves. Now is the time to let God have our lives and our great country – The United States of America.

The Lord will honor that kind of prayer; He promised He would in His Word.

“If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land." (2 Chronicles 7:14)

Slacker!

Yeah, yeah. So I'm a slacker. I haven't posted in a week now, but I'm still here! I have some very cool things to share, so keep checking. Here is an awesome scripture, in the meantime, that the Lord has used to really speak to me in the last couple of days.

Jesus says this quoting the prophet Isaiah:

"God's Spirit is on me;
he's chosen me to preach the Message of good news to the poor,
Sent me to announce pardon to prisoners and
recovery of sight to the blind,
To set the burdened and battered free,
to announce, 'This is God's year to act!'" (Luke 4:18-19, MSG)

Is there any question that we have a job to do?